Pitfalls
by sharingank
Summary: Sakura is a medic, but there are some wounds she just can't heal...NaruSaku oneshot. MANGA SPOILERS through chapter 295.


So. Recent manga chapter inspired me, and I haven't written NaruSaku in a while, anyway, so I figured this was overdue. Heehee. Hope y'all enjoy!

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**Pitfalls**

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"Why do you do this to yourself?" She whispers, her throat painfully constricted. Though she is a competent healer, her hands tremble as she touches him, gauges the severity of his injurires. "How am I supposed to fix you if your whole body's torn apart, huh?" She shakes her head, tears welling up in her eyes. "Idiot. Never know when to quit…" 

When she hears the sobs, loud, wrenching, heartbroken, she thinks they're coming from someplace else, from _someone_ else.

As soon as she pulls her hands away, sees the blood coating her palms like paint, she realizes that the anguish is hers.

_Enough. Calm down. He needs you, so snap the hell out of it. _

But now that she's started, she can't stop. The tears scald her cheeks like flecks of melted candle wax, and her analytic mind is completely overwhelmed. She's forgotten her training. She doesn't know how to mend him. She doesn't know _anything_, not even her own name.

_"Sakura-chan…"_

No, don't bring it back. Don't bring it back…

_"Sakura-chan, we'll find him. We'll make sure he comes home with us, trust me." _

Oh, but she does trust him. That's why his lifeblood is becoming fertilizer for the grass, why she's kneeling over him, crying like a basket case, red paint all over her hands…

"Sakura."

Yamato comes to her side, concern written on his face, projected through his voice.

"Breathe, Sakura. Take it easy, now." He squeezes her shoulder, and she wonders briefly as she glances at him what he sees when he looks in the mirror every morning. How does he perceive himself? As Yamato, or as the Shodaime?

"I…I'm not ready for this," she murmurs, feeling lost, hopeless, utterly alone. "I'm not. I already lost one of them. If I lose them both…"

What _will_ she do? Give up? Give in? Say to hell with you all, I'm finished, I've offered everything I am and more, and I'm not willing to sacrifice anything else?

Tsunade ran away. She drowned in alcohol, gambled and gambled and gambled and pissed her money down the drain. It didn't matter. She was _troubled_, so that gave her an excuse.

But duty came before self-destruction, and she returned to Konoha because it was right. Because the Hokage died and the village couldn't function without its anchor, its rock, its loving shepherd to shape and guide it.

Tsunade ran away, but she didn't stay away.

She went home.

Yamato exhales. "So don't lose him, then," he says.

---

_"You've grown taller, haven't you?" _

_Naruto clasped his hands behind his head, feigning nonchalance, though he really was quite pleased. Above anyone, he had hoped beyond hope that Sakura would notice his improved stature, especially since he had a few inches on her now. _

_"I guess so," he shrugged, flicking his eyes to the side. Of their own accord, his lips quirked. _

_She was watching him. _

_"I mean, I had to get rid of all my old clothes because I trashed them during my training, but they didn't fit anymore, either."_

_He peeked again, and their eyes met. _

_Was she blushing? Naw. She couldn't be. Not over him, at least. _

_Sakura smiled. "Black's a good color on you."_

_Well. He certainly hadn't been expecting a _compliment_, particularly on his attire. It meant she was observing him, obviously. Checking him out. Sizing him up. He decided he could deal with that. _

_"You too," he remarked smoothly. "Nice boots."_

_This time, there was absolutely no disputing the fact that she blushed. _

_---_

Naruto's skin starts to steam as she hovers by his side, a clear indication that his wounds are trying to heal themselves.

Trying.

The process is much slower than usual, and it worries her because she knows the price for unleashing so much raw power is perhaps more than he can pay. Kyuubi is killing him even as he is sustaining him, since one cannot exist without the other.

If Naruto dies, Kyuubi dies too, and Kyuubi is, first and foremost, an egotist. He'll do whatever it takes to ensure his survival.

And Sakura is stumped.

Why didn't the fox try to stop his vessel from snapping the way he did, from losing control so completely that he couldn't distinguish between friend and enemy?

But there lies the answer, of course.

Kyuubi is a creature of reckless action, of immorality, of impulse, and he is in love with destruction. He'll take the opportunity to strike if it's there, regardless of the consequences.

Sakura reaches into her pack and digs out a container of ointment she prepared before they departed on this trip, unscrews the lid. A sharp, almost acidic odor invades her nostrils, which is encouraging; the smell denotes potency.

She knows a few jutsus that she can try if the ointment fails, but she'd rather have them in reserve for now. She's afraid they might be too much, that his body might go into shock.

Slow, careful. She must be patient.

"How is he?"

Rage bubbles up from her belly and spreads like wildfire, though she steels herself, focuses on her task.

"What do you care?" Her voice is sharp, yet controlled. "None of us meant anything to you from the beginning, so it's no concern of yours."

Sai crouches, rests his hands on his knees. "Aww, don't hold a grudge, Sakura. I had orders, you know, and my master is strict."

She doesn't bother to look at him. "I believe I'm starting to understand you, Sai," is all she says, but he recognizes contempt behind the statement, and is silent.

Yamato crosses his arms, studies them sadly. They are so young, forced to grow up so fast… before they're prepared, before their time, and already bitter. But such is the way of things.

The way of the shinobi.

---

_"So you're a medic, eh? Old Tsunade didn't give you any trouble?" Naruto took a bite of his ramen, sighing blissfully. He'd missed the stuff, but if he were to be honest with himself, he'd missed her more. _

_Sakura laughed. "Of course she did. I was working from the moment I woke up till the moment I went to bed." She tapped her chopsticks against the edge of her bowl. "But I have learned a lot, so the grief was worth it."_

I can tell, _Naruto mused, and nodded. "You seem more…confident. Like you've finally figured out where you belong." He took another bite, reveling in his good luck. The girl he loved best had asked him here, and they sat side by side, eating his favorite food, at his favorite haunt. Sure, they'd both changed; there was no doubt about that, however their friendship hadn't. Hell, he'd even go so far as to say the distance, the loss, had made them closer. Judging from her body language alone, he knew she regarded him as a companion, not just a teammate, like she used to._

_Perhaps something so simple shouldn't have made him as happy as it did, but Naruto was a simple kind of person, anyway. _

_Sakura appeared bemused. "You think so?" Oh, he wasn't wrong. She did feel like she'd proven herself in the three years that had passed since Naruto left, yet she figured he'd react once he saw her fight. _

_She ought to have known better. He was still Konoha's number one unpredictable ninja. _

_He winked at her. "Well sure, Sakura-chan. I may be a little clumsy, but I'm not blind." _And I'm proud of you. One of these days, I'll figure out a way to show it.

_"Seconds!" Naruto held out his empty bowl, and Sakura, pleased in spite of herself, smacked him upside the head. _

_It was comforting to know that some things never changed._

---

Somehow, Sakura manages to slather him in the ointment, though her sudden surge of willpower comes as a marvel to her. It hurts to see him this way, almost unrecognizable beneath the lacerations and contusions, the skin that's so fragile, it sloughs off like tissue paper.

An irrational anger fills her for a moment, and she closes her eyes, holds her elbows. She doesn't hate Sasuke. She doesn't. She pities him. She fears for him. She wishes he would've used better judgment and stayed.

If he hadn't gone, they wouldn't be here, wouldn't have met Sai or Yamato, wouldn't be searching desperately for a clue, any clue, that would lead them to their vanished comrade.

If he hadn't gone, Naruto's life wouldn't be hanging in the balance.

But she doesn't hate Sasuke. She can't hate him. Every fiber of her being screams at her to love him, to find him, to save him.

And yet…

It is a truth she has been denying, a truth she has willingly chosen to ignore, however she cannot pretend any longer.

Sasuke will not be saved unless he _wants_ to be, and nothing she says or does will deter him.

Sakura runs her fingers through spiky blonde hair, amazed at how soft it is despite all that's happened.

She does not hate Sasuke, but if Naruto dies today, she will.

---

_"Did you hear any news about…about him while you were away?"_

_Naruto's chest tightened. "No. Sorry, Sakura-chan." And he meant it. _

_"Oh…don't worry about it," she replied cheerfully, quelling her disappointment. "I was just curious, is all." Sakura rested her hand on his arm, a gesture meant to assure him that she didn't blame him, and was only partially surprised when his own hand covered hers. _

_"I promised you that I'd bring him back, and I don't break my promises." He said softly. _

_For whatever reason, when he looked at her with those big, beautiful blue eyes, her heart got stuck in her throat. "I know," she murmured. "I know." _

_His grip tightens, though it isn't painful, merely protective. _

_"Sakura-chan, we'll find him. We'll make sure he comes home with us, trust me." _

_She did. She trusted him more than anyone else, because he always knew who he was, what he stood for, where he was going. _

_Naruto was Naruto, and she depended on him to _be _Naruto. _

_"Together?"_

_He smiled. "Together." _

---

Dusk. The sky is magnificent, awash in streaks of reds and oranges, but Sakura pays it no heed. Sai is nearby, drawing in his notebook, and Yamato reclines against a tree, his legs sprawled before him.

All are waiting.

_Please let it work, _Sakura begs. _Please. Don't take him from me. _

A stray leaf flutters from the tree, spiraling like a pinwheel, and lands on Naruto's chest, where Orochimaru stabbed him.

Her breath catches, and she glances down.

His eyes are open.

"Hey," he mouths, lacking the strength to speak properly.

She's crying, but she doesn't try to hide it.

"Hey." Sakura smoothes his hair. "How do you feel?"

"Awful."

Her answering chuckle is watery. "That's to be expected, I suppose."

He tries to shake his head, but she stops him.

"You shouldn't move—"

"No." Slowly, he extends his hand, and she takes it, puzzled. "I…hurt you."

Sakura chews on her lip. _He remembers…he must've been lucid then. _"I'm fine," she says firmly. "You're not, Naruto. If you continue to tap into Kyuubi's power, you'll die."

"Mm." He examines their clasped hands, and lifts his gaze. "Together."

Though it's slight, she feels pressure on her knuckles.

"Together," she agrees.

Satisfied, Naruto says, "Proud of you," before he drifts off, exhausted.

Sakura doesn't let go.

"Idiot," she murmurs. "I'm more proud of _you_."

---

_"I'll be Hokage someday, mark my words." _

_"Yeah, I know." _

_"Are you making fun of me, Sakura-chan?" _

_"No."_

_"Then why did you say that?"_

_"Because I'm not a liar."_

_Naruto didn't speak for a while, pondering. "Oh," he said eventually. "Well…I knew that, of course." _

_"Of course." _

_"Sarcasm," he accused. _

_"Maybe," she replied. _

_"Humph," Naruto said, and began to walk a bit faster. _

_Sakura laughed. "Don't ever change." _


End file.
